Mo Money, Mo Fazhan: A Rap Rundown of 200+ years of Chinese Economic History

Lyrics (and performance) by Jesse Appell, pioneering American comic and Fulbright scholar (Jesse is in Beijing after graduating from Brandeis in 2012 - with a double major in East Asian studies and international and global studies):

Lai, late qing, no bling
封建社会 all up in this place
鸦片战争 遍地都混乱
慈溪 on the throne and my Boxers in the spot
Hows a player gonna 发展 his 经济
Hundred Days reform, 拖裤子放屁
We need a better economic policy
Things all changed when Sun Zhongshan hit the block
He and his 民国 messed the Qing up
民主社会 经济拓展

I don't know 怎么发展 this 经济
好像 the more money we come across the more 发展 we see

Then we got my 哥们儿 邓小平
The man was 一米五 of ice cold bling
That guys southern tour was a tour de force
Brought the 发展计划 to the southern shores
He said 先让一些富起来
Now we livin it up we all 高富帅
We got the SEZ to raise the GDP
To get the PRC into the G20
Attract the MNCs but keep the 国企
Learn English by night and learn math by day
Put in ten subway lines just for the 奥运会
Build roads to 新疆 and trains to 西藏
Rebuild the 长城 and dam the 长江
Incorporate 香港,Don't talk about 台湾
Some days you're 乐观 some days its 悲惨
The scale is 广泛 the pace is 疯狂
And you know its on when they say 改革开放

I don't know 怎么发展 this 经济
好像 the more money we come across the more 发展 we see

以前是平房 Now we 高楼大厦
百货商店 that take up the whole block
Got 高速公路 and 高铁服务
Meanwhile 胡同文化不断在继续
Now its all 韩国人 and 火锅店
山寨DVDs and 智能手机
Got 3D, 3G, and 三国演义
We got 农民工 selling fake iPhones
富二代 out braggin bout their second homes
kids playin temple run neath posters of Lei Feng
Guys at the gym cause it's the only way to get guns
Ipads in one class no desks in another
A generation brought up without sisters or brothers
The 牛奶有毒,the 奶粉有毒
We got lots of posers who want to 投资
Got 郭美美,剩女 and 吊丝
We got 十三亿 all eating KFC
And 毛泽东s face still on the 人民币

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